Last night someone left a planet in our living room, and I’m sorry to say this, but I suspect it was Santa Claus. Perhaps he was on his way home from his world tour, and this planet thing was left over because they intended recipients had moved house and he didn’t know what to do…

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Lion Monk Discovers New Subatomic Particle! You’ve all heard  of protons, neutrons and electrons. Well I have exciting news for you. Recently I came across a phenomena entirely unknown to modern science. Right at this moment, lurking in the darkest corners of the universe, are minute particles of pure evil, which I have dubbed ‘eviltons’.Eviltons hide…

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I’m just getting back into the rhythm of writing my science column here. My latest research has revealed that we have so many molecules in our body, and they get spread around so much after we die, through wind and rain and plants breathing and ocean currents swirling, that the odds are good that every…

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